What is Domestic violence?

DV is a pattern of coercive, controlling behavior that can include physical abuse, emotional or psychological abuse, sexual abuse, or financial abuse (using money and financial tools to exert control).

DV victims have many options, from obtaining a protection order to staying in a shelter, exploring options through support group, or making an anonymous call to a local domestic violence shelter or national hotline. There is hope for victims, and they are not alone.

Emergency: 911

24 Hour Florida Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-500-1119; TTY: 1-800-621-4202

National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-SAFE (7233); TTY: 1-800-787-3224

Florida Department of Children & Families: 1-800-96-ABUSE (22873)

Legal Aid Service of Collier County: https://www.collierlegalaid.org (239) 775-4555

Helping Survivors: www.helpingsurvivors.org

BOCA Recovery: https://bocarecoverycenter.com/addiction/addiction-domestic-violence/

Financial Abuse: https://www.annuity.org/financial-literacy/financial-abuse/

Women & Finance: https://www.annuity.org/financial-literacy/women/

• Wants to move too quickly into the relationship.
• Early in the relationship flatters you constantly, and seems “too good to be true.”
• Wants you all to him- or herself; insists that you stop spending time with your friends or family.
• Insists that you stop participating in hobbies or activities, quit school, or quit your job.
• Does not honor your boundaries.
• Is excessively jealous and accuses you of being unfaithful.
• Wants to know where you are all of the time and frequently calls, emails, and texts you throughout the day.
• Criticizes or puts you down; says you are crazy, stupid, and/or fat/unattractive, or that no one else would ever want or love you.
• Takes no responsibility for his or her behavior and blames others.
• Has a history of abusing others.
• Blames the entire failure of previous relationships on his or her former partner; for example, “My ex was totally crazy.”
• Takes your money or runs up your credit card debt.
• Rages out of control with you but can maintain composure around others.

1. NEVER victim blame.
2. Hold offenders accountable.
3. Challenge widely-held perceptions about domestic violence.
4. Understand that abuse is rooted in power and control.
5. Trust the survivor’s perspective.
6. Question the way the media portrays domestic violence.
7. Communicate that domestic violence is not a “private, family matter.”
8. Root your conversation in equality.
9. Remember domestic violence affects all of us, but with action and education we can end it.
10. Just because you think the abuser is a nice guy don't discredit what the victim is saying.

Every person can take individual action to create a supportive community for survivors. Get involved in your community, speak out if you are a survivor if safe, and believe the victim.